BEING OLD IS HARD WORK

The Old Rusty Nail

AN E-JOURNAL FOR OLD PEOPLE

Russell Burton, an Old Person

Being old is hard work, it gets harder every day and no rests on Sunday. I have been old for nearly 6 years as I understand that being old began begins at age 80.  I read the other day that age 85 is very old. Yes. I agree with that definition but really describing it is in a sense surreal.  I have a difficult time understanding really what it is and that I am living it.  In a sense it is spooky.

Of course on the other side of the coin is less palpable so I am not complaining about this condition called old age I’m just trying to understand and  explain it.  All of my long-time good friends are dead. They have escaped this hard work of being old but then my life is still worth living.  I have never done this old living before so I am learning as I go.  Sometimes I make a mistake but hey, that is to be expected since it is my first try at it.  Yes, this is my first try at being old but then come to think of it, it will also be my last shot at it.  

One important symptom of old age and there are many and that is pain.  I have always been able to tolerate pain and old age is a very good test.  Primarily my pain is in my lower back (pelvic and lumbar regions).  Of course, this is a common malady of old people and for good reason.  We were not designed to walk upright, especially re our lower back region.  We evolved from walking on four legs.  And, as humans live longer this pain increases in severity and of course duration. And, living longer is also a relative new experience.  Life expectancy when ‘humans’ first began to walk upright was something like 35 years of age!  I had no aches and pains in my back when I was 35.

Re hard work, my activities today are pretty much common around my house.  I showered, made coffee, made the bed and had breakfast of banana nut bread which I made yesterday.  I decided to write some for my blog which I am now doing.  I watered my small backyard and took out the garbage in the container in the garage to the curb for the truck to pick up this afternoon. I will have to put it back into the garage after it is emptied. I did my 20-minute aerobics at the gym this afternoon and will play bridge tonight beginning at 6 PM.  Now, when I was a few years younger this much activity would have been much easier and not considered a busy day.  Oh well…

Yes, being old is a progressive process which gets harder every day.  I now use a cane more than I did last year and I know I will use it more in the future.  Just my daily chores which I just wrote about get harder to do as I get older.  Bending down to pick up something I have dropped by accident requires considerable concentration, effort and attention to balance.  But, I understand that I am in the small minority re my age to be able to pick something up off the floor! So, once again I should not complain.

I live in a house I bought about 15 years ago.  So, that would have made me about 70 years of age.  I did a multitude of repairs and improvements during the first 10 years.  I now marvel at how much I did and with great skill.  Of course, I could not begin to do those activities now.  I must pay someone to do them now or have my grandsons do some of them when they come over to help me.  Once again I must remind myself that just being alive at my age is quite remarkable.

Re being alive I noted the other day that at my age of 85 only 20% of us are still alive and nearly half of these survivors suffer from some of dementia. So, who’s complaining?

Of course, walking up and down stairs is difficult for me and can be a bit scary even with hand rails.  Without the support of hand rails I do not attempt to do those things.  I can still drive my car and in January next year which is only three months from now I renew my license.  This renewal at my age will be only for two years and at age 90 it will be for only one year.  Clearly Texas does not want old people driving and I understand why although I am still a good driver.  I am more cautious than I used to be but not to where I become an impediment.  So, when I reach 90 I plan to be out of my house and living in a ‘retirement village’ which fortunately I can afford. But still that thought especially giving up all of the collectibles over my lifetime which I see everyday reminds me of my past life and parents will be hard to accept but of course it will happen. I suppose these thoughts for most very old person are common ones but that does not make them any easier to accept.

One of my enjoyments and I still have many is my grandson Ben in his second year of college.  He applied for Willamette University located in Salem OR to major in some aspect of the environment.  He got a sizable scholarship which makes me proud. I have to pay the other half which I can afford.  I am amazed that he is going to this prestigious private college.  I’m so proud.

As I grow older I think more of my parents especially when they were my age now.  I did not appreciate their efforts in living this old age thing.  At times I wish I have been more attentive but I lived in Texas and they lived in California.  I visited them a couple of times a year and helped them out as much as possible.  Unfortunately, they did not make any plans for when they could no longer live in their house.

Not planning for their own future in old age was not fair to me.  They had saved a lot of money and had a good retirement income. Still, they just kept living alone and taking advantage of my friends who lived ten miles away to help them out.  My father was disabled with one artificial leg and suffered some form of dementia so at 88 he needed professional help.  So, I moved them to Texas and put my father in a retirement/nursing home.  He hated it.  My mother who was legally blind lived with my wife and me for a couple of years until she too had to move to where my father had lived before he died.

I write about them because they did not take care of their retirement support needs and left it to me.  That was not fair to me and will not happen to my son.  We live 11 hours by car from each other.  He has health problems and has a busy psychology practice so he does not visit me which I understand.  When it is time I will move into a local retirement home/village, but I will put that last major activity off as long as possible.  I have paid $250 to be on their waiting list.

I write this blog not to complain but to explain as best as I can what being very old is like for me and I suppose for some of my readers.

Updated 10/18